Exploring the Human Condition: altered states of consciousness

Posts tagged ‘horses’

Finally… I can breathe again…

It’s impossible to know how your life will turn out. As you go down the road, you can make plans, and choose certain paths… you hope for the best, and you work hard. And when difficult, even terrible things happen, it’s really not at all about the problem, or the obstacle, no matter how dire or hopeless it might seem. It’s all about how you react to it. It’s all about what you do about it. How you do it. How realistic you can be. How flexible and open to new ideas you can be. How willing you are to give and give and then still give some more. That’s what matters.

I haven’t seen two dimes to rub together in longer than I care to think on. I’ve given up all the modern American obsessions years ago, to live a simple, very basic life. I’ve always loved the Earth and gardening, growing things and flowers, I just never had the time to do a good job at it, because I had to work, and work every day very long hours, driving the long commutes back and forth, like so many, to pay for my place, for my dream. I had a great grandfather, but nobody provided for me. When I turned 18 and graduated, it was pretty much Adios Amiga! Good luck and all that…

I didn’t have the brains and the determination to be a true professional, mostly I didn’t have the discipline. A woman I met recently was hell-bent on defining everything in terms of her version of Astrology… or should I say “Ass-trology.” I know that’s very mean… sorry… (like on SNL: “sorry”) haha I believe in the stars and I know they direct and chart our very existence. But I don’t bring up astrology first thing when I meet someone… good grief, it’s 2014, and we’ve progressed somewhat since 1970 I think…

Anyway, for some reason, my fingers have always had an innate connection directly to my brain and whatever I have ever wanted to do, whether for fun or profit, I could do with my hands, or well, my fingers to be specific… I play the piano and I type really fast, without thinking about either one… Typing paid my rent, playing the piano has filled my soul and made this life very special indeed… feels like a gift from God actually…

But my homelife as a kid was never stable or easy, there was always tension in the home, many times abuse of varying degrees, and lots of dysfunction coming from the parents, which translated directly into lots of dysfunction in my brother, bless his heart, who has never recovered from it all… So my one dream as a girl growing up, was to one day have a home, like a small piece of land, with a house on it, that I could own, and love, where there would never be a harsh word, or fear or unhappiness, where animals and people alike could come and share good times and serenity. Live in peace.

Well this year I turned 59. And I think I have all the ducks in a row, after a very huge WAKE-UP call just this past week or so… it was 50/50 lose it all or hope for a miracle… Well, the miracle came, it’s not a windfall by any means, but I earned it, and now I’m sharing it back… one friend I love very much said once when he helped me out in a desperate time, just to pay it forward, that was all he asked. He had faith in me, that one day my life would turn around again, and things would sort themselves out properly. And they did.

This amazing summer of 2014 could be the end of struggling, and the beginning of only good things from now on. So good in fact, that I can start to think about writing on my other blog “In the Life and Mind of an Artist” and maybe even get started on my projects I’ve had to put aside for so long… To the young man who recently said to me, “Sew? Really? You haven’t sewed in years, why would you even want to start that now…” Like it was completely ridiculous to him. Well, son, I hate to tell you, but tell a woman she can’t do something, and she will do it come hell or high water… you’ll learn… Another supposedly “good” friend of mine, although usually being supportive on the surface, was always the one to remind me about “money” when it came to another dream of mine, which is to ride again, to have a horse again. Now I’d like to tell her to her face that it doesn’t take winning the lottery or even getting a huge settlement for an accident that should never have happened… What it takes is planning, financial strategies, a good heart, and a lot of help from upstairs… 🙂

Life is good at the Little Ranch, Summer 2014 Arnie at one year...

Life is good at the Little Ranch, Summer 2014
Arnie at one year…

This summer, after a couple of weeks of 24/7 stress for days, I see light at the end of the tunnel, finally, and I can blog now, and take pics with my great digital camera I love so much now… (took me a while to adjust, cause I’m older–haha) I can play my keyboard, maybe even get something I can use professionally now, and with any luck at all, all the things I’ve dreamed of doing can happen now. I won’t just have my safe home, but I’ll be helping a lot of other people in the bargain… just wait and see… this is my second chance, and I won’t be wasting it!

WWOOFERS 4 CENTRAL TEXAS

Completely from scratch organic growing concern located 24 miles east of Austin off Hwy. 290 and 95. Real business, not just a homestead. Exploring non-profit status for sanctuary farm, cruelty-free organic food production model. Many skills helpful. Vegetarians/Vegans only need apply. Looking for 2-3 women willing to work in exchange for room and board, weekends off in Austin. Must be good with animals, especially dogs. Computer, carpentry, chainsaw/tree/mill work, therapeutic massage, yoga, solar panel/conversion experience desired. Artists and musicians welcome to apply. This will be a healing place for animals as well as humans. Do not hesitate to apply if you are also looking for a quiet natural place for healing.

This is very small just under 4 acres tree-covered for the most part sandy soil, with clay, actually it is just sand… Lots of ants so we are focusing on greenhouse gardening and aquaponics besides regular beds. We have a very experienced aquaponics man on board now if you are interested to help and learn. We can use summer only or long-term would be even better as full-scale all season growing is one goal.

I am the owner/founder of the farm organization. My name is Cissy and I’m 59 years. I am currently in process of seeking investment partner(s) as well. Goals would include becoming a CSA, Saturday staff on hand mornings for educational and hands-on learning of farm work for kids from the cities, and establishing a credible farm animal rescue including equine. Goal is to feed ourselves with excess to farmers market, and to invite special kids organizations to visit and enjoy feeding the animals and helping in the gardens on Saturday mornings. Flexible in design ideas, implementation and creation. I am planning to blog our progress from beginning to finale and will provide sparkling recommendations for interns.

If interested, you would be bunking with 1 to 2 other females, in the big back bedroom of this home, which is under renovation as well at this time, which has a big private bath. You would be expected to help renovate/decorate your own room in addition to growing, cooking, preserving food, taking care of the farm animals, and cleaning. The home has a nice back porch for morning meditation, laundry chores, and just enjoying the trees and wildlife. Since there are renovations to the farmhouse in progress, luxuries and basic conveniences have been modified to accommodate. We are only using materials found on Craigslist reasonable in price or free, we recycle reuse and repurpose most everything. We are in process of locating a new farm truck at this time.

So if you have a vehicle, or even if you don’t, feel free to contact cissyblue555@gmail.com if you are ready for a brutal central Texas summer to share good health, happiness, hard work and campfires at night. Lake Bastrop is fifteen minutes away. Your own pet or horse is negotiable. Any age will be considered of course. If you are a man experienced in any aspect of plant growing organically, or basic homesteading with skills and have your own travel trailer, we have room for a couple of trailers. Direct your questions to my email above. Thank you! Cissy

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